I was playing football once and it was just after we’d finished season one and this guy, this defender, crunched me. Just you know, just tackled me quite ferociously and it took me a while to get off the ground and as I did he went, “WHERE’S MERLIN NOW?” and I thought, this is where it begins. This is where my life ends.
Then I just poked out from behind the corner, “Forbearnan!”
He then was, you know, obliterated into an ashy pulp.